


Find Your Footing

by AmberValCepri



Series: All the Bluster Inbetween [1]
Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age: Origins
Genre: After Orzammar, Comfort, Considering Religious Conversion, F/F, Kissing, Mentions of homophobia, Religious Discussion, Self-Doubt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-19
Updated: 2015-09-19
Packaged: 2018-04-21 14:24:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,534
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4832528
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AmberValCepri/pseuds/AmberValCepri
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Leliana offers her beloved comfort in the aftermath of the events at Orzammar and the Deep Roads.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Find Your Footing

**Author's Note:**

> Just a little something I cooked up after putting my little shield warrior through Orzammar. *hugs her*

Belia Brosca huddled into her tent staring at her armor and weapons sitting next to her, blue eyes locked on and barely blinking. They were a day outside of Orzammar and she couldn’t help the turmoil that made her heart ache and her stomach clench. Had she done the right thing? Rica had sounded so happy to be by Belen’s side, but was raising him up the right thing to do? Her people needed change, there was no doubt in that, but it would come with pain, with lives. She clenched her eyes shut and balled her hands into fists, she couldn’t doubt herself.

If she did all was lost, for who would continue if she lost her drive or her will? Allistair? The man could barely face himself, much less the troubles that came with trying to negotiate the treaties. Plus, there was a strange sort of… frailty to him that she didn’t want to break just yet. She would, she knew she would, but not yet. She forced her hands open and stared at them, pressing her lips tightly together to fight back the tears in her eyes. The large, sword and shield calloused hands shook slightly and she clenched them again.

The only real solace that she found was that she wanted so badly to believe Leliana’s words about the Maker that she was actually considering converting. If her own ancestors did not want her, could not find any redeeming qualities in her, perhaps he could? She swallowed through a tight throat then gasped as a hand slid over her fists. Calloused, but pale, soft hands moved over her own dark fingers and knuckles and she knew they were Leliana’s.

Belia had spent nights memorizing the feel of them, the look, the tone. She swallowed again and with a tiny, desperate sound opened her hands to grip them and move them to her lips to kiss them. Smudges of her garish, blue lip paint probably got on the perfect skin but she needed something to ground her.

“Oh, my love…” came the sweet voice that told her stories, made her forget for just a few moments what she needed to do, “Had I known Orzammar, the Deep Roads, affected you like this I would have come to you sooner.”

Belia shook her head and kept her eyes closed, trying hard to control her grip on the gentle hands, knowing she could do harm otherwise, “No, Lily,” she said the nickname that fit her so well, “this is mine to bare, I should not-“

“You are too severe and hard at times, my beloved,” she cut in, her tone showing her annoyance without Belia having to look at her.

She heard the human shift and the hands removed from her grip, but the dwarf didn’t look up until the crossbow wielding bard had lain a hand a hand on her cheek and she saw that Leliana was lain out beside her, head on the same bedroll as her own. Leliana’s beautiful eyes looked on her for a moment, then the hand on her cheek moved in a soothing motion, wiping away tears she hadn’t known she’d been shedding, “You do what you must, but showing emotion, especially amongst those you trust, is not weakness. Fear, doubt, even hate, are not weakness. They are a part of us that we all have to learn to deal with.”

Belia looked away, her short, brown hair falling into her eyes, “I can’t afford them, Lily. What if I make the wrong decision because of them? What if my hate had clouded my judgment in Orzammar any further, even when you, Morrigan, Wynne, and myself were in the rooms at the Inn and not out fighting or talking to people? I could have hurt Rica and her son. For a moment I hated her for being so happy, I was glad for it, but I hated her too.”

Angry tears, anger at herself for feeling that way, burned her eyes and she closed them, “That she could be happy while I suffered through the Joining, Ostagar, the Tower, Denerim? Is it… design of the ancestors? To make me suffer so for being casteless? Or is it something of the Makers?”

Leliana’s expression turned sorrowful, “Lia, you know that’s not the case. Your sister worries for you, is glad that you went where she could not, to the surface and out of Dust Town. And you are strong, my love, so strong for you to withstand everything. You were made to weather even the worst, built and hardened, but you are still a living creature. You feel pain, I want to comfort you in that.”

The dwarf slowly looked up at Leliana again, biting her lower lip as Leliana’s hand moved to wipe away more of her tears, “…And your Maker?”

She paused, then smiled, “He watches over you, even now, giving you strength to weather the storm that is the Blight and the folly of we mortal creatures.”

Belia turned to kiss her hand, “I want so much to believe it.”

“Then believe it. Doubt is a part of faith, but even if you cannot believe fully in the Maker, I would ask you believe in me,” the soft words were like a balm to Belia’s cracked skin, but she looked up in confusion at the last words.

“You?” The dwarf asked.

A soft giggle, “Yes, believe that I am always here for you. Maker-sent or not, I am here for you. To lean on, to find comfort, to talk, to fight, to argue even, if it would make you feel better.”

Belia’s bright blue eyes looked over her in a mixture of surprise and hope. She had never thought she would find someone like Leliana, ever since she found her interests in women and not men she had thought herself bound for a lonely life. No dwarf would stoop to the bed of the same gender by choice unless they were completely deranged, or so much of Orzammar said. The surface was different though. It had taken time, but she had learned soon that they didn’t much care who went to whose bed.

In fact, it was a long nightwatch talking with Zevran that finally allowed her to understand it fully. After that night, she was happy to have the almost terrifyingly open elf to ask such questions. He was non-judgmental and it had allowed her to realize why Leliana was so open with her affection even though Belia had barely even mentioned liking the human bard. When she realized Leliana was genuine, all bets had been off. She was a warrior though, not versed in any courtship. That had been Rica’s area and her sister had kept her staunchly away from the details.

But she bumbled her way through gifts with the ever supportive Zevran giving suggestions, and surprisingly enough, the sharp-tongued Morrigan giving tips on where to find said gifts. Finally, she made it through a shy confession, complete with a pair of shoes that were similar to the ones that Leliana had described to her from Orlais. Belia had blushed for nearly a week after Leliana started holding her hand. Things were slow, but she liked it, liked that Leliana thought of her, not the warden or the caste marked on her face, just her.

“Belia,” Leliana called the dwarf out of her revere.

She looked up and realized that her partner had been talking while she day dreamed and she flushed, “S-sorry…”

Another soft laugh, “There is nothing to worry about,” she soothed, “I would rather that dreamy look on you face than the scowl you’ve worn since we left the underground.”

Her blush darkened, “I’m sorry I was being…unbearable in Orzammar.”

“You were, but it was not a happy place or situation for you. I do not fault you,” and moved in to kiss her temple gently.

She pulled back a little, smile tipping into a grin as she saw the embarrassed look on Belia’s face and then moved her hand from Belia’s face to kiss her cheek. The shield wielding dwarf tried to hide behind her hands in embarrassment when Leliana found her lips, but Leliana pulled then aside and Belia melted instantly. The kiss was soft and chaste, but it made Belia feel as if something light had lifted from her, if only for a time. Leliana pulled back with a pleasant hum and then smiled at the warden, “Mind if I stay?”

And the flush was back in full force as Belia tried to stutter out a response, though she wasn’t sure if she was trying to say yes or no. Leliana laugh, a beautiful, lilting sound that made Belia quiet instantly, “Not like that,” the bard explained, “Not yet anyway. I’m just not leaving you to your own thoughts tonight.”

“O-oh….all right then,” she conceded with a shy smile.

Leliana kissed her again, “Let me just get out of this armor and get my bed roll.”

Belia nodded, staying where she was. The Maker had to have sent Leliana, it was the only way she could explain having the luck to receive her love.


End file.
